How Your Anger May Be Triggered

Are you ever truly aware of what makes you suddenly burst into anger?

One minute you are having fun joking with people but the next minute someone says something and you feel like you want to explode?

There are actually warning signs which signal that you are feeling angry. If you are aware of these signals, you can take effective steps to control and reduce your anger.

Anger is a physical response that is perfectly normal and healthy.

Everyone at some point feel angry because of someone or something that happen. What makes an outcome different is the way each person responds to these feelings.

Anger is also known as one of the flight or fight responses. Your body feels threatened and that’s why you have an adrenaline rush feeling to either run away from the stressful situation or to confront abruptly with what are pressuring you.

Each person will have different kinds of triggers and below are some of the most common ones:

That knotty feeling in the pit of your stomach
The onset of headaches
Jaw clenching or hand clenching
Rapid shallow breathing
The need to start pacing around
Excessive tension built up around your body
Sweating

As soon as you start noticing any of these triggers, you should proactively act on them in a good way.

It is crucial to understand what triggered these emotions. Many times it is “what you think about what happened” and not “what really happened” that is the cause of your feelings.

It’s more about your subjective interpretation rather than the objective occurrence of the event.

Have you ever found yourself saying things like, “you never consider my feelings” or “you don’t get what I mean” or “this is totally not what I wanted”? Most likely you may actually just be jumping to conclusions.

So the first thing you must remember is to NOT act instinctively. Instead, you should assess the situation in a third person manner and think before acting or speaking.

Another cause of anger triggers can be found in your daily routine.

Do you hate the long commute to work each day? Do you find yourself always getting mad when hanging around with a certain group of people or a person?

If so, look if it’s possible to reduce these triggers. Can you carpool with your friend a couple of times a week so you aren’t doing the driving all the time? Find other people to sit with at lunch time if possible, or go for a nature walk alone to reduce the amount of time spent with them.

The next time you start experiencing any of these trigger signs of anger, know them for what they really are. Your body is triggering a natural response so look for a healthy way to deal with the situation.

Notice that signal. Be aware of your emotions. And choose intelligently whether you need to stay to fight or to walk away from the bad situation.

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5 Types Of Anger That Are Sabotaging You Right Now

When it comes to managing your anger and emotions, you can often be your own worst enemy of self-control.

There are many forms of anger and each one of them has their own traits. If you suffer from frequent outbursts of anger, then it can help to identify what types of anger you are displaying and then look for solutions to deal with them effectively.

Type #1 Explosive Anger

This is the type of anger when you suddenly find yourself lashing out at someone.

This might happen when your kids are throwing their toys to the ground. This might also happen when your colleague leaves their documents on your desk or even just a jacket on your chair.

Type #2 Self-Abusive Anger

This is where you always blame yourself for the situation. You may find yourself saying and thinking negative things such as “I’m such a bad wife/ husband/ son/ daughter etc.”, or “it’s my all my fault that this happened”.

If you have this type of anger, it’s likely that you also have self-esteem and self-confidence issues. Working on these things will help you deal with your anger.

Type #3 Avoidance Anger

This is when you always say that things are fine when they are not. Instead of confronting the issue at hand, you try to look at it the other way and pretend that nothing is happening.

You need to learn that it is okay to let people know (and communicate strategically) that they have upset you or made you mad. This form of anger often stems from growing up in an abusive or troubled home.

Type #4 Sarcastic Anger

This is when you belittle people with sarcastic remarks or innuendos.

This makes them feel guilty and awful about the things they did. At the same time, you are damaging relationships between you two. You may actually think that what you are saying is as a joke, but it doesn’t often come across that way in other’s eyes.

People with this type of anger have often been taught to hide their emotions when they were a child. It might work at that time but it’s not healthy in the long-term.

Type #5 Irritated Anger

With this type of anger you often use words such as “I am sick of you doing this or that all the time and I can’t tolerate that anymore”.

This is normally a result of not being happy with certain aspects of your life. You may be sad or even jealous of someone or something else. Instead of expressing your fears, concerns and anxieties, you hide them by almost becoming offensive to people.

So these are the 5 most common types of angers. Once you can identify which type of anger you have, it will be much easier to find ways to deal with it. If they are particularly problematic to you, you should speak to a professional for advice.

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How Your Body Language Is Affecting Your Angry Perception

Did you know that your body language can often display your anger before you do it verbally?

While you may already know this, it is a fact that is often overlooked by many. That’s why it is important to understand what nonverbal communication is and how it can affect your relationships.

How many times have you stopped speaking to someone just because they intimidated you? Lots probably, this is a classic sign of nonverbal communication. Other signs of nonverbal communication include:

The amount of eye contact you make with someone
Your hand gestures
How you sit or stand (body posture)
How close you position yourself to someone (proximity)
How loud you speak (vocal tonality)

Have you ever been accused of sending mixed signals to someone?

This is when what you say, how you feel, and how you act do not match each other. So the person on the other end is totally confused and aren’t too sure of what message you’re trying to convey.

This can reduce trust people have on you because you never mean what you say.

If you tend to be more of an angry person, then you may often make sharp gestures, talk loudly and prefer to sit alone. If you are in a relationship, this is only going to send negative vibes to the opposite sex and makes you unattractive.

You need to learn how to reduce your nonverbal communication by improving your actions first.

This can be done by things like learning to speak in a softer tone of voice, sitting closer to your partner and making deep eye contact, learning how to control your gestures by not flinging your arms around or excessively talking with your hands. (Many people are guilty of this without even realizing it.)

You may want to practise in front of a mirror.

Then you can see if you tend to shift from leg to leg. Or if you move your arms around like crazy. You may even notice that you are always looking down at the ground when speaking.

These are all examples on what can be improved on with a little practice. Once you have these basic body languages under control, you will not come across as an angry person all the time.

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